Episode 232 - How Disconnection Leads to Divorce And How To Stop It

Sometimes, reconnection rather than divorce is the ideal solution to marriage issues. In this episode, Mardi Winder is joined by Dr. Lee Baucom, noted marriage expert and author, to help listeners consider their choices around marriage, divorce, and the potential for new relationships. As the creator of the Save the Marriage system and a seasoned therapist, Lee brings both personal and professional perspectives to the discussion, reflecting on how witnessing divorce in his extended family inspired his dedication to supporting couples. He shares that while not every marriage can, or should, be saved, taking the time to deeply reflect on such a significant decision is crucial, especially since the effects can ripple outward through families and communities.

Throughout the episode, Mardi and Lee explore why so many marriages encounter difficulty. Lee explains that most couples, after the excitement and effort of courtship, often unintentionally “pause” their relationship in favor of work, parenting, or other demands, believing they can simply return to their connection later. This well-intentioned strategy, he points out, usually fails, relationships aren’t static, and when crucial connections are neglected, couples often drift apart without realizing it.

Lee introduces his framework of three core types of connection: physical, emotional, and spiritual. While most people recognize the importance of physical closeness and emotional support, he highlights how the deeper, ongoing sharing of spiritual values, dreams, and fears is often overlooked. The conversation covers practical approaches for rebuilding connections, even when only one partner feels motivated to try. Lee shares how small, low-pressure invitations, such as taking a walk or sharing an everyday moment, can create opportunities for closeness without overwhelming a reluctant spouse.

About the Guest:

Dr. Lee Baucom is the creator of the Save The Marriage System, and an expert on thriving in life, as well as in relationships. He is the author of 7 books, the host of a podcast, and a frequent guest across media. He recently launched the Un-Pause App. In his personal life, he has been married for 37 years, has two adult children, and one side-kick dog. In his free time, he paddle boards, hikes, and plays pickleball.

To connect with Lee:

Website: http://UnPauseYourMarriage.com

Podcast: http://SaveTheMarriage.com/podcast